“At first, we didn’t even know what ‘dillies’ were.”
In a professional development seminar on physician reluctance to prescribe safe supply, Vancouver General Hospital clinical addictions psychiatrist, Dr. Pouya Azar, presented taped interviews from several of his patients.
This is Lily’s story.
Lily and her 14-year-old best friend Cassie (not their real names) discovered diverted hydromorphone together in early 2022.
“At first, we didn’t even know what ‘dillies’ were,” Lily told Azar. But the girls knew a guy who always had pills on-hand for $5 each.
“The first time I did hydromorphone, I felt like there is nothing to worry though, and I could just be myself. I wasn’t scared to be around other people [anymore]. It made me feel free, like I can do whatever I want,” she said.
“And then, I wanted to do it more because I liked how it would make me feel. I would always tell myself that I wouldn’t get addicted to it, but after a month of doing them, I already was.”
If Lily didn’t use them, she’d be cold, shaking, throwing up. “I’d be sick until I got it,” she said. “Every day I was doing one.”
Then Cassie fatally overdosed.
Even Cassie’s death didn’t stop Lily from using hydromorphone. She was in too deep by then. Many of their friends continued to use it as well.
But soon, hydromorphone wasn’t enough.
“It got to the point where I didn’t even feel it if I’d take one. That’s why I wanted something stronger,” Lilly said.
She’d been using fentanyl for about six months before she saw Azar as a patient.
“Right now, how quickly can a 12 or 13-year-old get hydromorphone?” Azar asked.
“Pretty quickly. Just text someone, tell them where to meet and they’ll meet you there.”